re-writes

On a recent walk, I saw a squirrel dart across the path and run up into a tree. When I looked up through the bare branches, I could see his tail splayed wide – presumably to give him better balance – and was struck by how closely it resembled the catkins of the pussy willow.

pussy willow catkin/flower

I believe it was Paul Valery who said, “A poem is never finished only abandoned.” I tend to agree with this, though I think there are different reasons for moving on, and the abandoning can happen at different stages of the writing process.

Sometimes a piece can be seen as “good enough” and there’s no great temptation to return and tweak it, but sometimes you just don’t have the right words, the right information or the right perspective to complete a poem, so you put it to one side, knowing that it is still lacking.

Fifteen months ago I posted a work in progress here on the blog:

Chrysalis

Tight as apple pips,

buds spiral around
a moss-supple stalk

anticipating spring
when they will split 

and shake free

tissue wings.

It was posted as a work in progress as there were several things I was dissatisfied with, including the last line. Several people made (mostly positive) comments, but I still wasn’t convinced.

At the time, I thought the tightly-packed contents of the buds I had found were petals; now, though, I’ve decided it’s probable that I was describing pussy willow catkin buds.

So, should I change those ’tissue wings’ to ‘squirrel tails’?

If so, does “chrysalis” cease to be an appropriate title? How many more knock-on tweaks will be needed before the poem is ready to be abandoned again?

Unknown's avatar

Author: don't confuse the narrator

Exploring the boundary between writer and narrator through first person poetry, prose and opinion

One thought on “re-writes”

Leave a comment

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.